Every Moment Counts

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Every morning at 5am, I send my husband off to work. Much like every other wife I don’t know what is going to happen from day to day. Will he be safe? Will the day be productive? All in all these are things that I obsess over as some might say. The truth is that I am very focused when it comes to time and what it does to every day life. Is there enough time to do what we want to, have to, or even to live in the moments in between those times? Only time will tell…

Last night was one of those occasions. He comes in, doesn’t even kiss me hello, and goes directly into bed and accuses me for “having put a guilt trip on him into kissing me” while he is briefly awake. So then, I stay up half the night, because believe me at this time it’s all I can sleep, thinking about how our lives have changed over the past eight years. I love my husband and I would never be as foolish as to think that our marriage was changing on the account of one kiss. But your mind tends to wonder when you spend a lot of time alone with your thoughts while everyone that you know is out there having a life while you are sitting at home and your partner only spends about an hour with you per day. From what we have all come to accept, society has lead us to think that a kiss can make or break a relationship, and yes ladies and gentlemen, I was in that place last night. Lately, we have spent so little time together on account of his schedule that I really am starting to get the impression that our marriage is changing. That based on something as simple and yet as complex as time that our lifetime commitment was and or is fading. For hours, I went around steamed thinking that our relationship had changed because my husband had not pressed his lips yup against mine for any amount of time. I talked to friends as the night went on about what this may mean. Was he still in love with me? Had his mind changed? Come to find out, he had a cold that he had contracted from a child that was riding in the back seat and coughing as they traveled. Here is my question though.. Would it had killed him to tell me that? Is communicating really that painful?

Options

We all have options. The option to get up in the morning or to push the snooze button, to go to work, to stay faithful,to draw breath. My best friend since high school is going through a really hard time because of the nature of his options. You see, he is in love. He is also the type of guy in “high demand”. He is sweet, handsome, hard working, balanced, and has a lot to offer in many ways. The problem, or issue depending on how you look at it is that he is in love with someone who is not available,  literally…. She is married. Some may automatically gasp at the thought, but I think it’s sweet from the stand point that he won’t let anything , even the fact that someone is unavailable on the account of  marriage not teach him the meaning of love. Don’t get me wrong,  I am not promoting infidelity, I just think his way of going about it is sweet, He’s her lobster….

I guess I have some explaining to do, at least about the whole lobster thing. Once a lobster finds a mate, they are together for the remainder of their days, so I’ve been told. Many species in the animal kingdom follow this practice, and so do some humans. Well, this is what I have seen my friend do, he has found his lobster. To better understand this, we will give these lobsters names.  Let’s call him Andy and her Angel. Those two have been at each other’s radar for over 17 years. They’re there for each other, they flirt with each other, and then they somehow end up with other people. Well, all of this took a different turn when about 9 years ago, Angel showed up to Andy’s hospital bedside with another man. This was a man that Angel had mentioned to Andy several times over the phone, but had never presented in front of him until his heart was in trouble and he ended up in the hospital. It made things complicated. At the time that this happened, Angel and her now husband Craig were just testing the waters to see if things would work as they had only known each other for a few weeks at the time. Andy knew that this was not just a guy for Angel because he could see it in Craig’s eyes that he loved her. Maybe he hadn’t told her, but he knew he loved her. There only problem that day was that Craig could see it in Andy’s eyes that he loved her too. For this reason, each of them paid extra attention to her in any way they could. Their stares towards her were a little longer, their hugs were a little tighter and they would each in their own way sit a little closer when they had the chance.  The three of them til this day act as if their lives came from a scene from Twilight.

 

Angel loves them both. Each with a passion that only belongs to them separately and their individual circumstances. She loves Craig because even though as silly as he may act sometimes, he would never give up what they have. On the other hand Angel loves Andy because he has always been there, and the sheer principle that there is nothing that he wouldn’t do for her… even if it meant  that his whole world would change. So, if your options were open, what would you do?