What do I do with him? The past few weeks it’s like I’ve been living with Dr. Jekel and Mr. Hyde. He goes from happy with his existence, to the next thirty seconds he is blowing up at the computer and asking me for help but not taking any advice.  So, now I just let him beat his own head against the wall sort of speak.

I want to keep on fighting this, whatever this is. He is different, almost numb. He goes back and forth between manic and depressive. Maybe that’s what he has become, manic depressive. So, what do you do when the person you love most is hard to find, like they’re not there anymore. I hate that feeling. The kind of feeling where it’s like there’s always this overwhelming pressure that makes me feel like he’s going to go off and I am going to be the target. Fine, let me be the one on the other end of the emotional freight train. Soon enough he will realize what he is doing to my heart, to my spirit. We shall see how he deals with me being absent one day…Maybe then, he’ll learn about things..